Friday, May 29, 2009

The five values of CARING...

Caring is the opposite of both indifference and hate. Without caring, nothing matters. That's why caring is at the heart of a decent life. It leads us to help others and to respect ourselves; it leads to actions of tenderness and protection. Sometimes people care for the wrong things or care too much about something. But people and institutions should demonstrate that they care about important things and about each other.

Responsibility - People who care must be willing to take responsibility. That means they are accountable for their actions, enjoying praise when things go well and willing to accept blame when things go wrong. Accepting responsibility is a sign of maturity; it can be frightening, because as I am responsible I become vulnerable to criticism. If I am responsible, I cannot blame my mistakes on peer pressure or what "everyone" does. Being responsible means being willing to stand up and be counted, to say "I" decided to take action. It was my choice, my achievement or my fault.

Respect - If I take responsibility for myself, others will begin to respect me. I can also respect others who stand up for what they believe is right. Respect for each other makes a moral community--a community of caring--possible. To respect others means to see them as valuable in their own right. I must listen to them and give them space. I should expect them to be different from me and appreciate their differences. Self-respect and respect for others go together, and both are essential. Self-respect means realizing that I am valuable, that I care for some things, and that I have to live with myself.

Trust - When people care for and respect each other, trust takes root and grows. If I trust you, I acknowledge that I need you for something, often support. And, trust also involves expectations. Trusting people means counting on them: depending on them and expecting them to deliver. Communities of people cannot exist without a certain level of trust. Like other values, trust can be foolish or misplaced, but a whole life without trust is impossible. Trust requires knowledge. I cannot trust myself if I do not understand myself, and I cannot trust you if I do not understand you.

Family - We begin to learn our values in our families, from the people we live with. Later our choices about love and sex create new families. We understand family to be the community that raises children, the community they leave to go to school, and the kind of community they may create themselves one day. Not all families are the same, and not all are perfect. But families have been called "the school of character," the place where values are taught and learned. And we take family stability, responsibility of family members to one another, mutual respect, and trust and care among family members to be essential to the health of our children and our society.

Friday, March 13, 2009

The best qoutes for life...on life...

"If you think you're too small to have an impact, try going to bed with a mosquito in the room." - Dame Anita Roddick

"Here is a test to find whether your mission on earth is finished: if you're alive, it isn't." - Richard Bach

"When a stupid man is doing something he is ashamed of, he always declares that it is his duty." - George Bernard Shaw

"Someone has somewhere commented on the fact that millions long for immortality who don't know what to do with themselves on a rainy Sunday afternoon." - Susan Ertz

"I've learned that everyone wants to live on top of the mountain, but all the happiness and growth occurs while you're climbing it." - Andy Rooney

"The most difficult subjects can be explained to the most slow-witted man if he has not formed any idea of them already; but the simplest thing cannot be made clear to the most intelligent man if he is firmly persuaded that he knows already, without a shadow of doubt, what is laid before him." - Leo Tolstoy

"How wonderful it is that nobody need wait a single moment before starting to improve the world." - Anne Frank

"Better the rudest work that tells a story or records a fact, than the richest without meaning." - John Ruskin

"The great use of life is to spend it for something that will outlast it." - William James

"If 'A' is a success in life, then A = x + y + z. Work is x; y is play, and z is keeping your mouth shut." - Albert Einstein

"Some people think football is a matter of life and death. I don't like that attitude. I can assure them it is much more serious than that." - Bill Shankly, 1913-81, Scottish manager of Liverpool Football Club, on the importance of passion in your chosen field

"When I am working on a problem, I never think about beauty. I think only of how to solve the problem. But when I have finished, if the solution is not beautiful, I know it is wrong." - Richard Buckminster

Monday, March 9, 2009

On belief...

Today, I was doing some inner reading - when I managed to recall the famous quote "It's not our life events that themselves directly disturb us. It's our irrational demandingness, our shoulds, oughts, and musts that largely do the job." - by Robert H Moore's in "A Guide to Rational living".

Recollecting this statement only reinforced to me the resonance of a mans ability to decide his own destiny...

I strongly beleive my qoute (Destiny is not destined - it is "DESIGNED") shall be among the "Quotable - quotes" one day...while it is easy said than achieved, the beauty of designing ones own destiny lies in this simple fact - DO WE BELEIVE WE CAN???

What an apt statement by Albert Ellis in the same book - "People and things do not upset us. Rather, we upset ourselves by believing that they can upset us."

The question is what do we beleive???

I have always questioned, answered, argued, consolled - myself to reinforce this universal truth...its I, me, myself who is solely responsible for my being what I am today...or for that matter what I would become tomorrow....

The question is what do I beleive???

I beleive, Destiny is not destined - it is - "Designed" - Chandramoorthy

Friday, March 6, 2009

Galloping ahead...

When my good friend told me he was getting himself ready to prepare for the next year's marathon run - from today...I was absolutely awe struck with his commitment - or is that what I thought?

The fact was - the practice sessions were planned at one of the most famous landmarks for the rich & famous of whos'-who of Mumbai - Mahalaxmi racecourse. So what, you should be thinking ???

Guys - if you know Mahalaxmi race course, how could you not know "Gallops" the retro restaurant - serving chilled beer, while you watch the Jocks traversing on their horses to net the ovations of their prospective betters...

Suddenly I get the much needed inner motivation to stretch...I mean push myself to join the group of prospective marathoners...I do...but not before I gave near heart attacks to my loved ones - my wife nearly missed a heart beat hearing the news, my mother is of the opinion that her son would win the marathon the coming year - brining pride to India...One of my good friend seems to have taken the Mahalaxmian way...Means - he is ready to bet his entire life earnings that I couldnt continue what I have started for more than 2 weeks...

With all this in the background - one can only but be excited about life...

Monday, September 29, 2008

Total recall...

I was facilitating a competency progression session for my colleagues - when I recollected the day where I came across someone who asked me four questions which would leave a mark on my life for ever.

It was four years back, I was attending a conference...a conference where it would be strategized - WHAT TO STRATEGIZE !!! Corporate Honchos all around, ties galring to break free from those double brested siuts, mobiles working hard to grab one others attention !!! A strange feel for a person like me who was yet to integrate into the jungle of no-where...CORPORATE !!!

In front of this large contingent of brain oozing people stood a 6'4" hugely built rugby player of the yester years - he had been a pastor too....Lenford Gerber - he was introduced with a fantastic edification by one of my colleagues....while introducing it was mentioned that Lenford could positively impact your life for ever & that if you WANTED to, you will learn WHAT you WANT out of his session....it really dint bother me much...I wanted to learn either ways - I was hungry to know what these corporate animals were made up of. I was waiting - but never knew I was at the wrong place at the right time - because after Lenford asked the group those life transforming questions I did not find a quite corner to just sit around & cry....

Those four questions hit me like a hammer even today - each time I think of.... Lenford named them the "Cross road questions"...but for me they actually built a road of meaning....

Would love to share them in my share space:

1. When is the last time I did something for the first time???
2. How OLD is my attitude???
3. Who am I when no one is watching me???
4. Why am I doing what I am doing???

If you find an answer to these questions - my friend, from this minute your road towards your destiny has started...remember what I always say:

Destiny is not destined - it is - DESIGNED....Chandramoorthy

Sunday, August 24, 2008

On Passion...

I just recollected an age old incident...

I was then working for an MNC, based out of Erode (MNC - out of Erode !!!)...during one of my routine trips (In a bus...)to a neighbouring town Salem, I couldnt fight my urge to attend to natures call & walked to a govt run pay toilet inside the bus stand...

Little did I know that the next 5 minutes I spent inside that dingy, stinking place would leave a irrevokable mark on the way I shall think - throughout my life...

The place was flirting with stink & I was choking to get out to fill my lungs with some breathable air, when I noticed something absolutely life transforming...In that place - there was a boy (should have been around 15/16 years old) who was employeed (!!!) to clean the toilet after each use.

The way he enjoyed executing that seemingly disgusting task was a splendor to watch...This boy was actually making each person walking inside - smile with his antics & laugh with him on his jokes...I couldnt think of a better way for any individual to elude passion !!!

When ever I am attending to a task today - all I have to do is recollect that 5 minutes for me to experience the level of passion with which I can DO things...

Sunday, July 20, 2008

I am back...

Sometimes you get into your own shell - thinking why you are doing what you are doing??? You neednt have a answer for all your questions all the time - some are better unanswered...

I was asking my self why I stopped doing something (Blog) which I started to...was I looking for others to take notice? May be yes - thats why when I did not get any notice for what I was doing I thought for whom I should do this? Surprise surprise ---- I completely forgot I am seeing what I am doing....thats amazing I forgot I am seeing what I am doing....

Now to ensure I keep myself in good stead & terms with myself I decided to do something which I love the most - be myself...

So with no compulsions that I am doing anything what I do for anyone else & without any predetermined thoughts that I SHOULD blog every week on fridays (How funny it is now to think I had done this to myself....hahahahaha) I have decided to start again...

Welcome back CM .... am sure youd love this journey too - as you have your others....

Remember Destiny is not Destined - it is - DESIGNED...